Or watch the video I created around this blog post on my YouTube Channel:
It’s the start of another new year: 2019. I am sitting in my quirky, multi-coloured condo on the small, tropical Thai island of Koh Larn. I keep saying to myself, I feel like I’m just getting started! It’s like there’s something BIG about to happen that I’ve been preparing for all my life.
Most people start their year by making a bunch of New Year’s resolutions, but the reality is that by February 80% will have given up.
But this year is different for me and you.
We get to start a new decade of our lives. We turn thirty this year!
I know age is just a number, but we can use these milestones as motivation to chase even bigger dreams and initiate exciting changes in our lives. All the amazing experiences and unique challenges you’ve been through over the last thirty years have brought you to a powerful position to step up and take things to the next level.
Today I want to share seven reasons why I believe that life really does get better after you turn thirty.
1 – You stop taking things so seriously
In your twenties, it’s easy to overreact when something bad happens. Maybe you lose your job or split up with your girlfriend. But after the dust settles, you realize that life does, in fact, go on.
This is a quality that you continue to develop as you gain more insight and wisdom from your life experiences.
After making a bunch of mistakes early in life, you can now move into your thirties as a more grounded human being, even when shit hits the fan.
Next time you are faced with a problem, relax for a moment and ask yourself “will this matter 5 years from now?” Usually, the answer is no. So, lighten up a little. Even if your worst-case scenario did actually happen, you’ll bounce back quicker than you could possibly imagine.
2 – You realize that things change all the time
It’s a fundamental law of nature: there is birth and there is death. Everything is always in a state of change. This understanding will allow you to move through life with more ease.
So, even if you’re having a bad day, just repeat this mantra in your head: this too shall pass. Ultimately your day will end; you’ll go to bed and wake up in the morning with an opportunity for a fresh start.
It’s also important to remind yourself that even the good stuff changes.
We often get attached to these positive experiences because of the cocktail of “feel-good” chemicals produced in our brain. Have you ever found yourself daydreaming about the “good old days”? The freedom you had when you were younger, the loving relationship, or a time when you had more money?
Perhaps when you snap back to reality, you realize there is this uneasy feeling inside you, created because of the gap between the past and the present. This indicates you have become attached to your past self.
The more time you spend reminiscing about the past, the more likely you are to keep craving those experiences and feel like something is missing in your life.
Instead, appreciate and be grateful for both the good AND bad. When you find yourself caught up in the past––be it a positive or negative experience––just let it go and refocus your attention on the here and now.
3 – You recognise your strengths
You’ve probably tried many different things in the last ten years, and by now you know what you like and don’t like. You’ve spent time developing certain skills and talents, so you understand what your strengths are.
It’s now time to stop playing small and spreading yourself too thin. Focus on your strengths and go all in by applying them to something that’s going to have a bigger impact on your life and the lives of others.
All my life I’ve been focused on serving clients and making money from my businesses so I can live the kind of lifestyle I want. But I never really went deep. None of them lasted more than two or three years.
I’ve now discovered that when you switch your motivation from making money to developing your strengths, money will show up as a by-product. It might take some time, but if you stick with this approach, you’ll soon turn work into play.
4 – You recognise your weaknesses
It’s important to be humble and admit when you’re struggling. It’s the only way you can move forward. At this point in your life, you should have figured out some of the things you struggle with and be comfortable with asking for help.
You’re not embarrassed or ashamed. You know your strengths and you know your weaknesses. You’re working on both.
5 – You have failed
We often hold ourselves back because of the fear of failure––that our universe will come crashing down if things don’t work out.
But your life experience has shown you that even when you fail, you can still pick yourself up, figure out what happened, and move forward with a renewed clarity and purpose. You know that this fear is all in your head, and the worst-case scenario you’re painting on the canvas of your mind will actually never happen.
This is important, as you’ll need to take some big risks over the next few years and it’s going to test you on a completely different level.
6 – You have succeeded
No matter how big or small, a win is a win. Upon reflection, you can see what conditions contributed to your success, so you can replicate them in the future. Maybe being super prepared with a detailed plan is what helps you reach your goal. Or perhaps going for a daily walk in nature allows you to mull over ideas and connect the dots so you can take that next step.
Whatever rituals work for you, make sure to build your life around them and do not compromise; they are the reason you’re able to take things up a gear or two.
7 – You understand people better
Humans are interesting and often irrational creatures. By now, you will have interacted with a whole range of people––from the poor and homeless begging on the street to wealthy bankers in their fancy pinstripe suits.
By mixing with a diverse cross-section of society, you start to develop more compassion for your fellow man. You realize that everyone has worries, fears, and doubts––just like you. You have noticed what kind of people energize you. You know, the ones who you could talk to for hours and never get bored. Conversely, you’ll have met people who you just don’t connect with. This is perfectly fine. We can’t be friends with everyone, so find your tribe and go deep. Quality over quantity all day long.
What does this all mean?
You are now a more grounded and compassionate human being. Your experience in the seven areas outlined above has given you a greater understanding of yourself and others. This puts you in a powerful position to really create something exponentially epic in your life. But don’t worry if you haven’t got it all figured out yet. I don’t either.
I mentioned earlier that I feel like my life is just getting started, and maybe you feel that way too––that something big is about to happen. You’ve finally got into a groove and been able to achieve some of your long-term goals, but now what?
It’s funny to think about how reckless and naive I was throughout most of my twenties; you can read about the 9 Important Life Lessons I Learned From Surviving My 20s here.
But my drug-fuelled, party days are over, and I am now focused on cultivating mastery around skills and activities I enjoy––like writing, playing the guitar, and paragliding.
Life really does get better after you turn thirty because you’ve grown up, matured, and developed a more accurate picture of who you are.
I believe true fulfilment comes from spending time immersed in something you love to do––without putting any emphasis on making money from it. This will come as a by-product as you master your craft.
This could be writing, painting, singing, brainstorming with a client, a deep conversation with your partner, snowboarding, or rock climbing.
And the list goes on.
Perhaps you’ve reached a certain level of success already. You have the car, the house, and a nice salary, but there is still an emptiness inside that cannot be filled with materialistic bullshit.
But the cool thing is, you would never have had this realization without going on that journey. So now it’s time to take everything you’ve learnt thus far and apply it to something that is more in alignment with what makes you feel alive and more fulfilled.